The past six months have been a mental struggle outside of job hunting. If you read my post on self-actualization, you’ll know that I have been going through an existential crisis. What makes it worse, is that I have not found the answer yet to this internal turmoil. During my search, I have gone through various phases where one day I thought a man would be the answer to my problems. Next, I believed a new job was the solution.
I was never into the idea of finding the answer in a man. So I immediately began job hunting for a new position hoping change might help. What I didn’t expect is the anxiety, insecurity, and complete self-esteem destroyer the process can be. Luckily, I’m finally on the other side and starting my new job on Monday, August 1st. But I couldn’t help but think about how other people were handling their job-hunting anxiety while working somewhere they no longer love. So, here are my 2 cents.
1. Why do you want to change your job
This was vital for me since it dictated my motivation for finding a new job. Initially, I was just sending out a few resumes every other week, thinking I just wanted to see if a new opportunity would become available. In other words, I was half-assing the process. There’s nothing wrong with just keeping an eye out and being open to a new option. I’m always for taking new opportunities as they present themself. However, whenever an issue happened at work, I would get frustrated and think that I need to leave as soon as possible because of how unhappy I was at my current job. My anxiety would get worse, as I found myself in a helpless situation. My effort was not matching how badly I wanted a new job and environment to work in.
Once I decided that I have to change my job as soon as possible and it was no longer about just wanting a change, I became more active and on the offense for my job search. I began to apply to 5 job positions a day and was set on achieving my goal no matter what.
2. Have the right resources and make use of them
There’s a reason why there are experts in the world. Use them.
Initially, I wasn’t even submitting a cover letter in any of my job applications because it intimidated me. I was genuinely lost on what to write. Without thinking, I would just send in my resume and just skip the cover letter. However, as a result, I was not hearing back from any position which I found frustrating.
People usually say to apply for a job, even if you only match only part of the qualifications. However, I began to get so insecure that I began to apply to jobs where I met 100% of the qualifications. Still didn’t hear back. As a last resort, I bought a resume and cover letter template from a financial influencer named Tori Dunlap that I was following on Instagram. It was quite affordable for me to not regret too badly if it didn’t work. I began to hear back from almost 60-80% of the jobs that I applied to by using her template. Her template also included interview guidelines that helped me get to the final interview for several companies.
3. Dealing with rejection without taking it personally
This might have been the most difficult part for me. I had promising interviews with several companies and reached the final step for many of them. Many times, they would just ghost or come back weeks later suddenly no longer wanting to move forward. It was frustrating nonetheless since I had all the necessary qualifications. It was confusing nonetheless.
One thing I learned the hard way is that most of the time it isn’t you, it’s them. This isn’t to make you feel better. You end up finding the hard way, that sometimes companies haven’t figured out if they genuinely need someone for the position you’re applying to. Or they’re going through a hiring freeze but still interviewing since they still need people for certain positions. There are numerous reasons why things can fall through. What we need to focus on is that reason is most likely not you unless they specifically tell you otherwise and oftentimes its ridiculous. I was once told indirectly during an interview that I didn’t look old enough to make senior VP’s and CEO’s listen to me. I learned the hard way about ageism.
4. Staying motivated at your current job
I completely failed at this brilliantly. But still felt like it was important to bring up. I was essentially unhappy in my company for a while by now, almost a year. While applying to companies and already having one foot out the door, whenever I heard remotely any good news from one place I was always struggling to not just throw both hands up and leave my current job. Getting work done was extremely difficult. However, I had to keep reminding myself like a mantra that I needed to still focus on my role until I signed an offer letter and sent my two weeks’ notice. Anything before that was just shooting myself in the foot.
If you’ve set your mind to resign whether or not you have a new job in line, that’s completely different. Feel free to get reckless and send your two weeks now. However, if you can’t afford to be reckless whether it’s for money or any other reason, I suggest you call someone to hold you back when you get the sudden urge to just let go while still searching for a new job – because that’s exactly what I did. So even though I didn’t stay ‘motivated’ I tried my best to do my job until the last day.
On the other hand, if you’re not employed or doing a part-time job, your motivations are different in why you want to be motivated in your job search. What helped was connecting with someone that was also going through the job search with me. I found myself connecting with my friend who was going through the same situation, as we found ourselves experiencing the same ghosting or insecurity during our job hunt. It not only held us both accountable but made us feel less doubtful in our abilities as we vented to each other. It becomes easier to rationalize the job hunting anxiety you feel with a soundboard.
5. Don’t give up
Persistence is the key. Since I got my current job during college as a sudden opportunity, I never experienced job hunting anxiety like this before. Applying to hundreds of job positions or going through 4 or 5 interviews just for one position was all new to me. Not giving up was hard, but realizing I wanted a change more kept me going.
That being said, good luck on job hunting! And if the anxiety gets too hard to handle, reach out for more help by talking to someone professional. My therapist is always my pillar of support as I unleashed my anxiety on her every week these past few months while job hunting.
Photo by Hello I’m Nik on Unsplash
